The Travis Prouty Experience

Suspend your disbelief

2009-09-07T17:08:00.000-07:00

Brad Almost Dying

2009-06-25T12:06:00.000-07:00

The Daniel Scotti Magic Show

2009-06-21T19:18:00.000-07:00

Pictures from my phone

2009-06-21T19:15:00.001-07:00

The Education of Emily Klein

2009-03-25T18:09:00.000-07:00

So last week, I went into the computer lab and some girl had left her email logged in. “How foolish,” I thought, sending her an email from herself that cautioned young Emily Klein about the inherent dangers of leaving your email logged in. “Fortunately for you,” I wrote, “I’m a nice guy, and I’m going to log you out without messing with you.”

I thought that was the end of it, I had played a small part in the education of Emily Klein, teaching her things that you couldn’t learn in school; perhaps at school would be correct, however, to my dismay (or delight) when I went to log into facebook this tuesday at the computer lab, alas! the young lass had once again left herself at the mercy of cyberwolves. Obviously young Emily had not learned her lesson, and indeed more drastic measures were needed.

After I changed her status to “I left my computer logged in at the computer lab.” I logged her out, and then went to check my email. Well well well… look who was still logged in. Little Emily IS foolish. I decided to teach her a lesson she wouldn’t forget.

Going back to facebook, I typed in her email and then clicked Forgot Password. It sent me a link to her email that let me to reset her password to youseewhatcanhappen? (password strength: weak, but what do I care?) Not being entirely cruel, I then sent her a message from her email.

“Dearest Emily,” read the note, “My my! You obviously haven’t learned your lesson! Now you will realize the dangers of leaving yourself logged in at public places. I have taken the liberty of changing your facebook password. You now realize how easily I could have ruined your social life! However, I remain a nice person. I hope that next Tuesday I won’t find you logged in…for your sake.

Regards,

Mystery Man

The Hottest Action to Hit L Fo in the Past 20 Years

2009-01-23T14:49:00.000-08:00

"Sir could you step out of the vehicle please?" That's what I heard as I was ordering my delicious Chicken Spicy Jack Quesadilla in the Del Taco drivethru last night. In my rear-view mirror I glimpsed a policeman at the window of the SUV behind me. He handcuffed the guy and asked if he had any weapons or drugs in the car, and I immediately thought of the weapons and drugs I have in MY car.
"Sir? Hello?"

Oh yeah, I was ordering. Anyways, I'll have a Diet Coke with light ice, that's LIGHT ice mind you, and that's it. So I drive around and pick up my food, and by the time I pull around into the parking lot and get into Natasha's little orange box, there were 5 cop cars surrounding this guy and they were rifling through his SUV like it was an episode of TJ Hooker. Just then, Dillon and Dom pull up and TOTALLY BLOCK OUR VIEW. We frantically wave them off, but they just sit there, grinning. So we pull forward, look over, and get this, one of the cops is going through the drivethru while the other guys are taking care of business. That's what I'm talking about.

So anyways, we're watching all this unfold with great delight, shushing each other and enjoying our strawberry shakes (which have REAL strawberries!! Thanks Cami!) and they eventually let the guy go. He does an abrupt u-turn (I was kinda hoping he'd stick it to the man and go through the drivethru, but alas no such luck) and drove away.

As you can imagine, we are DYING to know what happened, and Isabel declares that as a tax-paying citizen, she has the right to know. So she walks over to the cop car, waves, and introduces herself to Officer Ron, who is more than willing to share his manly cop-doing-his-duty-fighting-crime-and-protecting-young-innocent-girls-such-as-yourself story with her. I guess there was a burglary and that guy's car matched the description. Kind of a let down...
But can you imagine being that guy?! SO excited for your Del Beef Burrito, and then BAM! handcuffs and public humiliation. I guess it just goes to show that...well, I've got nothing.
Don't drive a similiar SUV as a criminal I suppose.

Science in Action #2

2009-01-05T12:03:00.000-08:00

Bad luck shmad luck. It's all in the name of progress.

About Time '09

2009-01-01T18:22:00.001-08:00

Dramafree '07
No Regrets '08
This year, I propose About Time '09. A year where we do all those things that we've wanted to but never have; a year of ambition; a year of successes and failures, a year of trying something fresh. No inhibitions, but an overwhelming feeling of empowerment. You've always wanted to go skydiving? Do it. Wanted to travel to a foreign land? Buy a ticket. Wanted to star in a motion picture? Move to India.
This is the year we remember, the year we combined our We-don't-care attitudes from '08 with the reckless abandon of '01. You know what that adds up to. So go out there, talk to that girl, buy that motorcycle, climb that mountain, and live your life.

No Silent Night This Year

2008-12-13T16:07:00.001-08:00

It's been over a year now that I've been driving in silence. It has been a contemplative time; I've learned a lot about myself, that in the absence of music I will make up for it by just singing bits and pieces of every song I've ever heard until it becomes a cacophonic mixtape that rivals any American Idol auditon. I also learned a lot about my car, that it is freaking loud and and rattles like a Henry Ford concept. (Part of that is me trying to take out my passenger seat for some reason???, failing, and not putting all the screws back in all the way.)
It's interesting, driving in silence. You think a lot more than you would if your ipod or radio were playing. You begin to think, "Why the heck does my radio not work!" You begin to get bitter. You take out your frustrations by furiously twisting dials and knobs yelling, "Work you piece of crap junk radio!!!" But to no end...your radio just looks back up at you in silence, it's big doe eyes looking up at you glistening, saying "Why won't you love me?"

Because I just want some music! Volvo radios have the geenniusss feature that if your car battery dies, the radio goes to a code setting, and you have to go a Volvo dealer to get the code reset, as to prevent thieves from stealing a crappy stock 1995 Volvo radio.
(Please, it happens more often than you think, people.)
Well because my radio happens to be a reconditioned factory something something, and not the original, the code doesn't work, and I have to take my car in and then they have to take out the radio, and it will cost cash monies.....and I don't think so.
Do you know what I did? I freakin manned up is what I did, and took that radio out myself! Sure it took me 2 hours, and I had to use a traditional Masai warrior knife instead of a screwdriver because that's all I had in my car, and I accidentally dropped an allen key down in my gear shift and almost ruined my car. Now my radio works again...after more than a year....I feel like a man. I should go hunting, or lift weights or something...but I don't need to, because I fixed something on my car, which is basically the manliest thing you can do. (Change your windshield wipers fellas, you'll see what I'm talking about.)
Oh and you'd better believe that I blasted those speakers at max volume driving home. They've been on sabbatical for far too long.

Doing the Impossible

2008-12-10T18:35:00.000-08:00

A common occurrence among C Group leaders who are of a college age is to become increasingly exasperated with your junior highers. So much so to the point that after your Tuesday night C Group, you and your co-leader (in this case we'll just call him, ah...okay how about "Joel") will agree that going home and studying for your finals is about the absolute LAST thing you feel like doing. After being stuck with a bunch of 7th grade boys for an hour and a half, one likes to get out of doors, stretch one's legs, and do something possibly illegal in certain states.
On that note, "Joel" and I decided to head over to Taco Bell to replenish our depleted energy stores before we began the night's endeavors. As we sat eating, we pondered what the heck Taco Bell employees do when they have no customers and are bored as heck. After much deliberation, we surmised that in addition to plenty of TB behind-the-counter-romances, they also most likely just experiment with the 10 different flavors that they offer. I'm all for getting 20 bucks, going to Taco Bell and asking them to mix whatever we want. (Like a Cheesy Double Beef dipped in cinnamon and sugar??? Huh? Yeah? Who's with me?)
An 89 cent Triple Layer Nachos and a medium drink later, "Joel" and I were about to head out. As we walked past the counter, I saw that little coin game that Taco Bells have, you know, the one where you drop the coin through the slot and try to get it to land on the bottom platform? Basically a scam to raise money for disadvantaged kids. Anyways, I found a nickel in my pocket, and being the benevolent type, I figured I'd give it a shot, even though it's basically impossible.
With my 5 cent donation, I was looking at a free bag of Cinnatwists. A quarter could win you a bean burrito, but who even likes bean burritos? Not this guy. So I'm fiddling with the little twisty part, when all of a sudden, the coin drops off. Well, that's that. But wait! Mine ears heard not the merry jingle of fallen coin greeting their new found brother! Lo and behold, there lay my nickel, resting precariously on the final ledge! The curse had been lifted! "Joel" and I shouted in celebration, cheering our good fortune. Being as how we were the only ones in the store, I can see why the lady behind the counter looked a little annoyed. BUT WAIT. It gets better.
The lady grabs the twisty coin game, looks down at the coin resting on the platform, and spins it off angrily. Then she goes behind the counter, grabs a bag of Cinnatwists, and wordlessly shoves it at me! You'd think I'd just asked for all the money in the cash register. (Which wouldn't be a lot, because Taco Bell is so cheap, yet offers incredible values!) As we're walking out to the car congratulating each other and munching on our prize, the lady walks out of the store on the phone, looking very P.O.'d. All that we could assume is that she was on the phone with corporate, either reporting that they had been compromised, or that the Chosen Ones had been found.

I can dress like Bond

2008-10-23T11:44:00.001-07:00

I just found possibly the greatest website ever created. Men everywhere, rejoice.

http://www.jamesbondlifestyle.com

Python Attack!

2008-10-03T13:36:00.000-07:00

Hell Froze Over

2008-09-04T09:50:00.001-07:00

Or Jesus is coming back tomorrow...I'm not sure what's really going on.

Wildside Camp

2008-08-02T11:22:00.000-07:00

Wildside camp was awesome. Several important things happened on that trip.

First, I realized what I was missing in life: getting involved in other people's lives. This summer I wanted to go on a PEACE trip to Ukraine, but I wasn't able to raise enough funds. God obviously didn't want me to go for a reason, and I really believe that that reason was Wildside camp. I grew so much there, and I think that investing time into students lives is exactly where God wants me to be. (6:30 Wildside service here I come)

Second, speaking of growing, my hair did a sweet little number while I was at camp, as can be seen here

Third, my cabin won cabin cleanup. This is a huge deal, and very much a reflection on my father, who,while we were in Kenya, would make us wake up at 5 every morning to rake all the leaves in our compound. Those days of slave labor have obviously had a lasting effect on me, and in a positive way. ;)

More to come as I recall funny stories and life changing experiences that happened this week.

Spring Break Done Right '08 No Regrets

2008-03-23T21:51:00.000-07:00

I feel very accomplished. This week was my Spring Break, and I wanted to make it the most action-packed, exciting and adventurous week possible.

On Monday I went on an adventure hike with selected friends to a secret location chock full of nifty adventures/photo ops. Not only did we discover a natural sandstone cave, a hidden airstrip, and grass tall enough to hide in, but we also got a significant amount of healthy exercise and exploration under our belts. I also discover that I am a trendsetter. I took some sweet photos of us standing in a field of flowers, and after I posted those on facebook, two days later I've counted 4 different people with similiar pictures. Now, I'm not trying to be "that guy", (sorry David) but idea thieves!!!!! You all wish. Anyways,

The rest of the week was pretty much spent playing volleyball at the beach with Dmitriy and Andrew, working on the tan, and secret spa seshing. Basically, I don't feel that a moment of my week was wasted at all. Now all I have to do is try to focus on the memories until summer....

Science in Action #1

2008-03-05T18:49:00.000-08:00

So I've invented this new diet plan. It's called CCI, and I've been on it for 3 weeks with dramatic results! CCI stands for Constant Caloric Intake. In other words, I just keep eating all the time, whenever I want! Here's the scientific breakdown on how it all works.

The stomach receives the nourishment, and immediately begins the digestive process. (Alright, I know that digestion begins in the mouth, but for the sake of my argument... whatever.) The food is broken down into energy I can use for activities such as going to the gym, running in circles, or hyperventilating. As the stomach digests, room is made. Here's where it all comes together! Before the stomach can say, "Hey, I should probably convert this food into some sort of stored energy for later!" I feel the void in my stomach, and instantly fill it with more food! That way, my stomach doesn't have time to think about the future, but has to focus on the here and now! It's pure genius. Not to mention biblically sound!

"Mat 6:34
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

That's RIGHT stomach! Stop converting calories into fat! It's completely unnecessary.

On a completely different topic, I think my dryer is broken. All of my shirts seem a little tight. Huh, weird.

Lies.

2008-03-03T00:49:00.000-08:00

Whoever said that hair doesn't come back darker and/or less soft is a liar. And my aspirations for wearing a speedo are waning fast.

All About Sleep

2008-02-26T22:49:00.001-08:00

I watched a movie called All About Eve today in my History of Women in Film class. Now first let me explain what I'm doing in a History of Women in Film class. There are about 7 guys in a class of 40, and they are easily categorized into 3 different sub-groups.

Group 1 - Slimeballs
The lucky fellas in this little group are the same guys who stare creepily over at girls when stopped at traffic lights. They are only in this History of Women in Film class (HWF)
(©Davidmhughes.blogspot.com) to either find a "study"partner, or because they're currently stalking someone, and they just happen to be taking this course.

Group 2 - Unlucky boyfriends
Ah, alas, this is the sadder of the three groups. Young Jim, so desperately in love with Belinda, cannot bear to be away from her side for more than 4:30 - 7:00. He feigns interest oh so well, and dejectedly bears the ridicule of his fellow man. The poor sod could really care less about HWF, but in a never-ending effort to please his love, sucks it up, and trudges on, his only solace an occasional backrub when the lights dim.

Group 3 - Guys who are like, what the heck? How did I end up in here?!
This is the group in which yours truly belongs. Persons in this group probably had a friend named Tanner (who falls out of the categories of any of these groups) who convinced them to take the class, and they, having nothing better to do on a Tuesday afternoon, reluctantly agreed. I mean, how boring could it be?

YES. THAT BORING.

Okay, no, today's film was really good actually. All About Eve moved along a little slow, but I was interested the whole way through, and the character development was very well done. In regards to langweiligness, I was referring to last week, when we watched the Katherine Hepburn autobiography film. Okay, SHE hasn't even seen it!! That's how bad it is. So she lived to be 96 years old. That's impressive. But do I really want to watch a cheesy Lifetime Channel original showcasing her collecting firewood when she was 83?

Er...not so much.

Somethings just aren't enough...

2008-02-13T20:26:00.000-08:00

We all know that having an accent makes you more attractive. Some how we are attracted to the mystery of the unknown, the new, and the different. Everyone flocks to the "new girl". Don't deny it, you all know what I'm talking about. Well as much as that is true, i don't care how beautiful/interesting you are; if you have the whole "a naturál" thing going on and refuse to
A. Shave your armpits or B. Take a shower,
you could have the most bangin' bod and coolest accent ever and I would have to pass.
i.e. theFrenchgirlsittingnexttomerightnowintheSaddlebackCollegelibrary.

Life Goal #47 - Go to Paris with a suitcase full of Axe bodyspray.

Word of the Day

2007-10-19T11:12:00.000-07:00

gour·met (adj.) "A fancy name to put on stuff that don't taste good so they can charge you more." - C. Ellis. see also Crap.

Notes to Self 1

2007-05-07T06:09:00.000-07:00

Here's a handy piece of advice. If you go to Pizza Hut and order, say a large, thin-crust, sausage, and happen to leave a plastic bag full of red pepper and parmesan cheese packets in your car when you're done with it, make sure you throw it away soon, because hypothetically, that bag could turn upside down, and some of those pepper packets could be ripped open, and (hypothetically mind you) that pepper could go EVERYWHERE in your car.

REM (Narcotics bring out things buried deep in the mind)

2007-01-11T00:58:00.000-08:00

REM

Falling asleep
I caught myself by the fingertips
And held on to a conscious ledge
Dangling between life and dreams

Somewhere in the limbo
1, 2, 3, 4, REM
That is where I’ll find her
That is where it all began

I start to lose my consciousness
And my fingers start to slip
But have I lost my conscience?
Or is it all just a trick?

Will she ever be on the other side?
Will I ever get it back again?
Like Alice’s mirror, everything grows clearer
The farther away you get

I pulled myself up onto that ledge
And there I found a cave
Its coal black hole beckoned me
Invited me to stay

The Cave of Truth boasted an inscription
Carved above the darkness
Fear and hope simultaneously filled my heart
As therein all wounds would redress

I entered slowly with cautious steps
Readily dreading what I would learn
Why one relentless dream haunts my sleep
When the cave took a sudden turn

A dazzling light that burned the eyes
A voice as deep as the ocean and calm as the sea
What is your question? Quietly questioned the voice
What is it that troubles your sleep?

My voice trembled as I shared my dream
Of a jade rabbit on a scarlet cord
That I polished everyday with tender care
And next to my heart I wore

The jade would glow and grow warm to the touch
It would come alive in my palm
My rabbit would dance and make me smile
And sing me a happy song

But as my dream continued
My rabbit grew cold and hard
Its life was gone, its red string frayed
And then it shattered into shards

I pleaded with the shining voice
Tell me what I’ve done
Is there any way to put the pieces back?
Is my jade rabbit forever gone?

The light shined fierce! Then faded and dimmed
Whereupon I saw the voice’s owner
A bearded man with gentle eyes
Put his kind hand on my shoulder

Real love, my son, is freely given
Regardless of what is received in return
Innocence that is once driven
Seldom comes back; no matter how much yearned

Some things just won’t accept honest love
Because they’re scared or have been hurt before
It can’t be real, and though unproved
Such emotion is an impossible torch

But my love was true I remonstrated
And I’ve done nothing wrong
Yet the moment I confided my affection
My jade rabbit changed its song

Crying out in grief
The green little Coney wailed an eerie tune
Growing colder each time I touched it
It ripped my heart in two

Now I stand in the middle
Of a thousand pale emerald pieces
All of them independently incoherent
Each of them whispering a different reason

Together their muttering voices swell
Into a cacophonic shout
Here’s the reason why she’s gone
This will answer all your doubts!

Love itself is a powerful thing
It’s something true, something pure
A noun, a verb, an offering
It can only be given; you can never be sure

What someone will do with love that’s free?
It’s up to them, it’s their own fate
Why, you might mess up their schedule
How very inconsiderate!

I still don’t understand this dream of mine
As I hang here between dawn and reverie
Maybe one day I’ll find her again
Twixt the shores of life and illusion sea

My fingers grow tired of holding on
And once again I fall
I’ll have the same haunting dream once more
Until the morning calls